confession

i found this letter few years ago...

Dear Carlos,
It has been quite a while now since the last time we met. I would never forget the companionship we were able to nurture for the briefest moments. The way you have eaten the donut. And still, until now, with all the distance separating us, I am not yet forgetting.
Would you believe that the feeling I had for you, which I had confessed over the phone, is still within me, alive and beating? This letter would be a testament of it. If I know it had died, I would no longer remember the pain.
At night, together with the stars, I am swimming in your memory.
But as what I have told you, I am not looking forward to a possibility of a union. It is enough that you know and I know. I have accepted the fact that I can only have you on my mind. But isn't the feeling more lasting, when what I have is something which is within me, like a dream?
I still want to go on dreaming.
What I need to learn though is the art of letting go. Even without possession.
And so, with all I have said, I want you to remember this: that somewhere, a soul is burning for you, keeping all the fire, blazing, dying, ember by ember.
This is the kind of death I passionately submit into.
Until then,
Rick.

lovely